?

Log in

No account? Create an account
PBRrodeoGirl
25 October 2005 @ 11:49 pm

hey y'all.... been awhile again huh?

i know.. i'm slow at updating...    actually, my latest addiction is MYSPACE.COM... awesome deal there, can't believe none of my friends mentioned it to me sooner!   wanna add me on myspace? click this!!      i have more than a few friends on there from high school, which is kinda cool... along with others of course!

so you're probably wondering how things are going.. well, they're actually pretty good.. financially, i'm doing tons better... i finally have a couple hundred in my account, granted more than half of that is going to my parents.. they covered my ass and paid everything for my vehicle to become 'legal' in NC.  

that all included:

  •  registration    ( registration & tag alone costed well over $200 )
  •  license   
  •  insurance
  •  inspection sticker
  •  tag

so yeah.. its been an eventful month...    with my truck.

as far as jobs go.. i'm at subway now, everyone pretty much thinks i'm the manager there seeing as next to kristie & charles i have the seniority.  yeefloopinhaw.   they're paying me 6.50 and giving me 40 hours.    its not the best job, but its money and i can't complain since its almost winter here and this place thrives on tourism... in the SUMMER.    gah.... i hate touristy places.

jeff has told me that he filed for divorce.    thank gosh.   i really didn't want to have to drive up there pay $40 in gas then whatever the fee would have costed... apparently.. its running him well over $700 because he hired a lawyer to help him fill out the papers.    we have nothing we want from each other so its a clean break.     i'm just happy to know those papers will be in my hands sometime before the end of the year, which means by Christmas i may be a free woman or well on my way to being so.... my one wish for the new year is for the divorce to be final... i don't think i could honestly ask for a better gift.   i know, most peopel don't ask for the gift of a divorce... but when you wanna start over, what can you say... you know?

so y'all like my layout? i snagged it from a place online that makes them for free... angelina jolie is my ballsy bitch... i love her to death... i really want one of those team jolie shirts....anyone know where i can get one cheap?  and don't say ebay! they're not cheap!

 
 
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl

so a bit has happened since i last posted.       nothing overly dramatic....  but it'll do.

lets see the biggest thing thats happened at the moment is that i got a new job. i'm working for kristie & charles again at subway.   starting pay hasn;t been set in stone, but kristie said it'd either be 6.50 or 6.75  and there's a huge possibility that i may become the night shift manager.   yeehaw.   i mean, its a job.   its not cleaning rooms... granted, i'll be smelling like an onion and pickle.     yick.    but i dealt with that for a few years and it may just be temporary until spring next year when maybe i'll get on at the casino.    but until now, this job is a lot better than the sleep inn. i just need the 40 hours.   i still have to work the kinks out and call kristie back and let her know when i wanna start, which i think tuesday would be good seeing as thats when the new schedule starts.

so other than that, jeff has decided to be a bastard and make me pay for the divorce unless i want to wait until he can get free help with the forms.    free help isn't that great, he found out that we have to be seperated for 60 days before legal aid withh help and after that there is a 3 month waiting list... so it'll be next spring before the ball even gets rollling.    i want it to be rollig before then so i'm going to start saving up money to get a lawyer to help me with the divorce papers. they shouldn't be that hard to figure out though seeing as we're not wanting anything the other has and its a pretty well uncontested divorce.

tomorrow is going to be a good day.   i'm gonna finally go out and have some fun with my friends.  greg's coming to visit and we're gonna hangout with josh for awhile then go find somethign to get into.   it'll be nice to get away from here for awhile.

so i'm just wondering how many montgomery gentry fans we have out there in lj land? if you're a fan.. reply to this and maybe we cn get up a rather big group to go to the concert they're going to be having here in cherokee at the casino... tickets prob won't be that expensive... but i just think it'd be awesome to see if any peopel are interested.   troy's so sexxxy.

 

 
 
Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: just once ; 8 seconds soundtrack
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl

Amen, sister JoDee.

today started out a little better than yesterday (seeing as yesterday everything i touched, dropped to the ground) work was alright.. i got about an hour more today than what i did yesterday and tomorrow i'll be ready to fall in bed when i get home cos i offerred to help out in housekeeping. oh well, i do need the hours.   hell, i need a new job - i'm only working weekends now. 

i had to call jeff today, really no choice.   i hadn't recieved my bc pills he was supposed to have picked up and sent out on monday... he has to send them to me since my prescription is at a pharmacy in jonesborough and of course, the health insurance is tn only.   so if he wouldn't pick them up i'd be screwed.... either way i am semi screwed because its been almost two weeks since i had my last pill.  on top of that i recieved an email from him saying that his dad decided that he wanted kaci back in exchange for the remainder of stuff i have at jeff's.      buncha bs if you ask me and knowing the situation that jeff would have to keep kaci and said he'd let her starve or take her to the pound.... yea, i called him and gave him a royal piece of my mind.

the dog's registered in my name... she and my car are the only two things i really walked out of that relationship that i owned (well the car is in my name only and i'm making payments)   i came to the conclusion of telling him to send my stuff to me or trash it, whatever he wanted.. i figure its probably worth $30 or less... i can replace it, i took all the important stuff when i left... apparently i left a few pairs of pants there in the washer... oh yea, he accused me of cheating on him also... and said by now i've probably moved from josh (who, mind you is my best friend and i've dated before but cut it due to the friendship we had being more important) onto about 6 other guys.   yeah, i'm a whore like that.   right.      he's the one doing the dating websites and getting chicks from those sites to email me personally... now how screwed up is that?

eh.... moving on....   other than that i've been good.    there is one person in particular that i can think of right now and always thats been a true miracle to me throughout this and will continue to be.. you know who you are..   i couldn't be more happier to have you in my life right now.

 

 

 

 
 
Current Mood: uncomfortableuncomfortable
Current Music: jodee messina
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl

i truly believe that God has a plan for each of us, and in this plan he makes a path for us of both good & bad choices and decisions we make.   

jeff and i are filing for divorce.     don't be sorry, don't be upset & please don't worry.    i am fine, i am doing a lot better than i thought i would.   the first few days back at my parents house were very very hard. i called jeff the first 3 days constantly.   i was looking for something to hold on too and then i realized with the help of a very close friend that there was nothing left to do just that.    he has helped me have a positive look on things from this moment on and i couldn't be anymore thankful.

as for jeff and i.. we both had realized in our last conversation that this would be the best thing for us, to move on and to both be happy with whatever happens in our lives from this moment on.

i am not sure that i will keep this LJ public or if i will make a friends only, but i will be posting again really soon to update everyone on everything that has happened in my life.   to those of you who have commented and such thank you for your help and your concern.  

God Bless,

 Krystle Gail

 
 
Current Mood: hopefulhopeful
Current Music: the day before you ; rascal flatts
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl

the heading to this entry is of course, lyrics to a song as are most of my entries. . this one is far different though and could not be more important compared to other lyrics i've used.

now you're probably reading the lyrics over & over thinking... what song is that and who the hell is the artist?  well, if you're not familiar with country music then you'll never know and if you are familiar with it, but don't know of montgomery gentry... not only do you need to be shot, but you will also never know what song that is.       i'm a pretty big montgomery gentry fan, i have all of their cds (surprising? nah...not one bit) this song has been on repeat in my brain for a few days now... and it pretty much states a lot about this entry.  for once, the lyrics are actually setting the tone.  yea... thats a revelation for me!

jeff and i are seperated.     yes, seperated.   no, not divorced.    where am i?   back at my parents.     what happened?     a lot of things, but it was a mutual agreement on me to leave so we could both live & not want to kill each other.   this brings me to the money issue.   thats the biggest issue as to why i left (and save the lectures because i know you don't leave due to money) we were at the rock bottom and digging thru that core just trying to survive.   my job at ryan's was great and all but they didn't keep their promise on 40 hours, the most i recieved was a whopping 24 hours and at $6 a hour.....   eeeeh.   it didn't help our income much.     we overdrew our bank account 4.... yes 4 times, in ONE week!    we had no financial help from either set of parents, no shot in hell on getting any type of loan (which even if we did, we'd have to pay that back and with the size of our bills.... yea.... we didn't even consider a loan being an option)  with october comes my first truck payment....    we were in jeopardy of having that vehicle bein' taken by the repo man. we were also in jeopardy of not having near enough money to save our auto insurance.    there were really no other options to us but for me to leave, so i could get back on my feet financially and so that jeff could as well.  

neither of us wanted me to go.    i saw jeff cry the first time the day i was packing my stuff up.. which i had only two or 3 things packed up in the truck when he got home from work.. but i know it hit him hard.    it was extremely hard on me making that decision.  i used to believe love was all you needed to get by in a relationship..  and maybe it is...  but... when you have bills and only one decent source of income.... love becomes taken over by money.

we both still believe there's a chance of me moving back and us being a family...  but there's also that chance of a divorce.   either way we both know that we weren't fighting when i left and it was pretty much something we both agreed on....   as we see it now though, neither of us want a divorce.

 

i have a job here at my parents.. i got it by my sister.   which it scared me... she's never wanted to even try and help me...  they told me it'd be 30 hours a week promised.   yea... i worked maybe 12 hours this past weekend and i haven't worked yet this week but for 30 mins.     wow.   i can't afford it, especially with my new car insurance and my truck payment.....  so i pounded the payment and applied at a few different places today.     which pissed my sister off and started the jihad at my parents house today... my sister thinks she's the manager and she tried to get me fired once in the TWO days i have been there.. but failed and said she'd definately get me fired the next time...  she's mental.. y'all just wouldn't have no idea.

oh but anyway, i guess other than all that everything is okay.   i've got in communication with a few old friends which is great and hell, i've even managed to make some new ones so things aren't entirely bad.     

 i've already decided not to dwell on things no matter what happens with jeff and me.  we're both taking our time to think for the next few days after me being an emotional freight train since i've been home and calling him more than i should.... he promised me tonight he'd call me in a few days and have something figured out... we both need time to think if it'll work or not... but either way i've decided as i said, not to dwell on things but to either work my ass off and try to salvage the marriage... or go on and start my life over...    thats a lesson i learned with my ex fiance'    you can't dweel because you'll become some depressed morbid person.... or at leats i got that way... i'm a different person now.

you know.. i'm just wondering if anyone else was a bit dissapointed with brooks & dunn's new cd, hillbilly deluxe...?       because i feel like it could have been a lot better than they made it... kinda let me down a bit but i still love my BD!

 
 
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: listening tot he computer make noises
 
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl
22 September 2005 @ 04:58 pm

update time.   granted, not a happy upbeat update this time around.

 

so i'm not completely sure of how things are between jeff and myself.   its horrible.    seriously.    i want to leave so bad at times and others i don't.   its just all in how he acts towards me.  i hate it.  hell, i hate everything.     its depressing.    really,   depressing.  it feels like we do so good for awhile and then shit happens and its back to square one of the bad shit.    i don't know anymore and i hate saying that and knowing i don't know where the hell we stand anymore.    i love jeff.   i made vows to him that i don't want to break, but he gets me to that point so much.......    argh.

my job is going good. amazingly enough its not the root of any of our problems this time around (as it has been in the past with previous jobs) i haven't brought home work once since i started at ryan's.      amber (from walgreens) started today at ryan's.   i got her the job and i get a $50 giftcard to wally world for getting her to come in and apply.  its all in good sayings though because she wanted a new part time job that would cooperate with her schedule in college.    they've agreed to work aroudn her classes and whatnot at ryans. she's going to be a server....   i'm still happy about it all because now, i'll be able to become more of a friend to her and i at least knwo there is someone other than brian over here thats my friend and i can hangout with.

speaking of friends... my search for josh d. is over.     as of tuesday night on the way home from mom & dads.    desi and i made a trip thru sylva in hopes that he'd be hanging out somewhere or one of his friends would be so i could at least get his number or something.  for those of you who aren't familiar with josh d. he was one of my best friends and somewhat a brother to me back at mom and dads... i knew him for a year before jeff & i met.   i have been looking for him for over a year now trying to get back in touch with him and i never gave up... so it goes to show you to never give up on things because when it seems liek all light is gone there's still a spark left somewhere.    so i'm happy that i got to see him again, we exchanged numbers and he got to see desi.    at least i know when all else fails i have a few true friends to rely on.    i told him next time i come back for the weekend we'll have to get together and just hangout like the old times.... i missed him so much as i did nessy.    which he gave her my number!  so i called her yesterday and talked to her for give or take 15 mins.....  its always great to catch up with old friends :)

so besides the deal with jeff....  everything else has been fairly good.    i just wish we could both be happy forever.  or at least longer than a week.    argh.

i'm sure y'all heard baout britney's baby boy, sean... i think thats the name they decided on.. i never cared much for her, but now she portrays a real person more than jessica or lindsay.. any of the pop singers today.   she's a mother now, and thats about as real as you can get.....    i know it;ll change her in so many ways.. i'm glad everything went good and everyone's alright though....   i know soemtimes thigns don't go as planned and stuff happens....    yea, i know.. i was concerned about a celeb.     ah well.   she's a person now too... always has been.....

 

 
 
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: whatever jeff's watching on tv and its not music.
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl

wow its been awhile now and katrina is still reaking havoc, even though she is long gone.  its horrible.  everyone has a different take on it all, its overwhelming to me... i work at ryan's (steakhouse) now and a lot of the people who have came in have voice their opinon about things.. its sad to think about it really... it depresses me. 

i feel so bad for the families and i look at where i am right now, i am lucky because i have a family to come home to everyday. i have my husband, step daughter and my puppy.  some people lost the only thing meaningful in their lives, their pets. that completely upsets me to no end seeing the children and the pets without anyone or searching. i am hurt by all of the survivors who have lost.. its just overwhelmingly sad to me.    

 i'm not in the greatest shape as it is, jeff and i had a pow~wow (the serious, LAST talk) earlier this week. i told him that this is his last chance to prove to me that he's going to try to change his ways or i'm gone.    even with that and the stress we've had.. i'm still thankful, as is anyone who hasn't been affected by katrina.  (which even if we weren't physically connected, we are all in some way emotionally connected)  like i said, i have my family.     i still pray for everyone that lost.....       

we're supposed to be taking in some people from LA here (tri cities) from what i've heard they have yet to show up though. so who knows.  my mom has already mentioned they've taken in people in asheville (nc)  its so great to see the people out there givign just anything to help.  it makes me realize that this nation is so banded together.

----------------------------

in other news, i heard from kim this week.  i got a letter from her.... it was unexpected.... but i wrote her back.  she seems to being doing okay, but her depression is kicking in again as its been almost two years since she had her miscarriage....   i feel for her, because i could not imagine what it must be like to carry a child then to lose it suddenly....   her boyfriend and her are getting along good as always and she misses me.  i miss her too.. she's what i consider to be an older sister/best friend.

as far as luke is concerned (guy i wrote about last entry) we still are friends, but its minimal.  so much for trying to find a friend online.. funny, i found my husband online.... and no friends. oh well.   thats my fault, but i have met two people.. brian and a lady who owns a dachshund that plays with kaci... (her doxie does - haha)  and brian's been my bud. i can talk to him about anything and he'll listen. hell, he put up with talking to destiny the other morning for well over an hour!

 

 
 
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: who i am - faith hill
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl
04 September 2005 @ 02:18 pm

i'm at my parents for a long Holiday weekend. i left friday after work, and am not sure if i'll stay tomorrow night (monday) or leave later on in the evening.    decisions.    i hate making decisions.    but oh well. jeff said it was fien no matter what i decided, but i bet desi will miss me, i know i already miss jeff, kaci and desi.. so i'll prob leave tomorrow.  (homesickness, what can i say ?)

my mom has bought faith hill's new cd, fireflies.    its decent.  different from any other faith album, thats for sure. i'm halfway through the cd, on stealing kisses.. *hence the journal's subject line* 

ramblings about my night online last night... i figured i'd do a cut on this.. save space.Collapse )

so... i start ryans this wednesday. i hope to gosh gas goes down a little. cut me some slack people. i mean seriously who wants to pay $3.25 for a gallon of petrol?   not many people, but unfortunately those of us who don't have public transportation avail or live too far away from work to walk or ride a bike.. we need some relief. gosh.  jeff and i are thinking trading my cavalier was a mistake, but hell.. at the time there was no hurricane and gas prices were somewhat decent... now we have an explorer, which its not that bad on gas but my car would have been better. enough about that though.. i guess you can say i can be very opinionated if i want to be.

so i heard from kim the other day via email. she's doing good.   always nice to hear. its amazing but i never thought an ex boss would become a best friend to me.. but in a way she is. we don't hang out or talk we just email each other anymore.. but its still cool to know that i do have a friend left in nc.

jeff's had the weekend to go hunting around the house... he's had fun from what i understand.. i really believe we both needed this weekend apart.. and besides he got to babysit kaci!   poor dog.. i miss her, i wanted to bring her but with three other dogs .. well, four with my sisters dog... kaci gets really wound up.. so yea...

 

 
 
Current Mood: indescribableindescribable
Current Music: baby i want you ; faith hill
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl
27 August 2005 @ 03:09 pm

job.         i applied at ryan's and was hired pretty much the same day i recieved and filled out the application.   wow.

              - i also applied at cingular for a call center job.    call rep.   yeehaw.     

now.. putting two and two together on that one, which job do you think i'd rather have??

             A:      cingular.     i actually had my "preliminary interview" yesterday afternoon with them, i think i did horrible.. evidentally, they thought differently.  after taking "notes" and putting me on hold the woman told me that i was eligible for hire within the company and that i would be contacted by them as soon as an "appointment" was avail.   she gave me a number to call incase i thought there might be an appointment open and they decided not to call me.   eeee.    i'm still suffering from mixed emotions on what she said..  but in life you can't really rely on a maybe or in this case, and appointment thats not currently avail.     

             so...with that typed in here, i'll be going to ryan's unless cingular happens to call me before 9/5.   even if they call me after i'd be stupid not to at least go in for an appointment.. the starting pay is, $9 per hour.. and goes up to $11.50+      i don't have stupid on my head.. so we'll see what it all brings.    until 9/5 i'm staying at the pioneer and working out a week's notice.

i finally took pics of my car.. i'll place them under the cut because i know that the majority of y'all could careless what my explorer looks like or you've probably seen one before..

    (i'm getting a decal for the windshield that has the ford emblems and says "get a little mud on the tires")

pictures of my new muddin' wagon deluxe!Collapse )

 

 
 
Current Mood: hungryhungry
Current Music: goodbye time ; blake shelton
 
 
PBRrodeoGirl
21 August 2005 @ 07:01 pm

I GOT A NEW VEHICLE!

 

seriously. i did. its so frickin' awesome. i love it!!!    its not exactly 'new' persay.. but its a very excellant used one.   1999 ford explorer eddie bauer (sp?) edition, with.. get this..   66,000 miles!!!!!   now how great is that find?   and when i said excellent, i didn't just mean the price and miles.. but the vehicle doesn't have a scratch to it and very minimal wear and tear on the seats... i'm seriously about to be spolied like never before.

i'm taking pics tuesday of it, since we didn't bring it home tonight.. which i know you're thinking.. wtf, why didn't you bring it home?! but it was late, we sat in that place for 4 hours straight debating and arguing (well.. jeff did that, i did the paperwork) over the price and whatnot.. they just got the explorer in last night... and by luck we just happened to stop in on a whim, not expecting to find anything... just looking, before the movie.. and the guy happened to lead us to that gem.  i'm glad he did.. btw, our salesperson was awesome. he was so nice and he bargained to get us what we wanted.     he even listened to jeff bullshit him and go on about his huntin' dogs and website. too great.    

after car browsing we went to a movie.. we intended to go out and eat at areally nice place, but that was shot.. anywhere in johnson city on a saturday night is bound to be busy as hell.. so we opted for good ol' pizza hut.. the server was great, jeff actually tipped her which was funny.. cos he never does that.. but she was good too.. unlike most waitresses at those joints. anyhow---  

we went to see the DUKES OF HAZZARD, which honestly.. wasn't the best movie in the world, but i liked it.. to an extent.  i wouldn't shell money out to buy it on dvd... now jeff would... but eh....    i've had one helluva weekend, thats for sure..  

we've made it now where no one has yet to find out about us getting a new car today other than jeff's ex wife (which he had to call he and ask her to take destiny up to his momma's due to how late it was going to be when we got out of that dealership) and apparently, she didn't tell them anything. i'm going to tell mom i traded my car in.. i think they'll be happy.. its a better vehicle and i think it will last a good long time.   desi's going to love it. i already do!

i'll post pics when i get them!

 

 
 
Current Mood: ecstaticecstatic
Current Music: barely famous; the warren bros show